I steal this from one of my friend’s blog because it is so nice… Have fun reading ok…
The “ONE” That Got Away….
In your life, you’ll make note of a lot of people.
Ones with whom you shared something special, ones who will always mean something. There’s the one you first kissed, the one you first loved, the one you lost your virginity to, the one you put on a pedestal, the one you’re with…and the one that got away.
Who is the one that got away? I guess it’s that person with who everything was great, everything was perfect, but the timing was just wrong.
There was no fault in the person, there was no flaw in the chemistry, but the cards just didn’t fall the right way, I suppose.
I believe in the fact that ending up with someone, finding a longtime partner that is, does not lie merely in the other person.
I can actually argue that an equal part, or maybe even the greater part, has to do with the matter of timing. It has to do with you being ready to settle down and commit to someone in a way that goes beyond the little niceties of giddy romance.
How often have you gone through it without even realizing it?
When you’re not ready to commit in that mature manner, it doesn’t matter who you’re with, it just doesn’t work. Small problems become big; inconsequentials become deal breakers simply because you’re not ready and it shows. It’s not that you and the person you’re with are no good; it’s just that it’s not yet right, and little things become the flashpoint of that fact.
Then one day you’re ready. You really are. And when this happens you’ll be ready to settle down with someone. He or she may not be the most perfect, they might not be the brightest star of romance to ever have burned in your life, but it’ll work because you’re ready. It’ll work because it’s the right time and you’ll make it work.
And it’ll make sense, it really will.
So that day comes when you’re finally making sense of things, and you find yourself to be a different person. Things are different, your approach is different, you finally understand who you are and what you want, and you’ve become ready because the time has truly arrived. And mind you, there’s no telling when this day will come. Hopefully you’re single but you could be in a long-term relationship, you could be married with three kids, it doesn’t matter. All you know is that you’ve changed, and for some reason, the one that got away, is the first person you think about.
You’ll think about them because you’ll wonder, “What if they were here today?” You’ll wonder, “What if we were together now, with me as I am and not as I was?” That’s what the one that got away is. The biggest “What if?” you’ll have in your life.
If you’re married, you’ll just have to accept the fact that the one that got away, got away. Believe me, no matter how fairy tale you think your marriage is, this can happen to the best of us.
But hopefully you’re mature enough to realize that you’re already with the one you’re with and this is just another test of your commitment, one which will just strengthen your marriage when you get past it. Sure, you’ll think about him/her every so often, but it’s alright. It’s never nice to live with a “might have been,” but it happens.
Maybe the one that got away is the one who’s already married. In which case it’s the same thing. You just have to accept and know that your memories of that person will probably bring a nice little smile to your lips in the future when you’re old and gray and reminiscing.
But if neither of that is the case, then it’s different. What do you do if it’s not yet too late? Simple…find him, find her.
Because the very existence of a “one that got away” means that you’ll always wonder, what if you got that one?
Ask him out to coffee, ask her out to a movie, it doesn’t matter if you’ve dropped in from out of nowhere. You’d be surprised, you just might be “the one that got away” as well for the person who is your “the one that got away.”
You might drop in from out of nowhere and it won’t make a difference. If the timing is finally right, it’ll all just fall into place somehow and you know, I’m thinking, it would be a great feeling, in the end, to be able to say to someone, “Hey you, you’re the one that almost got away.”
Nice post
I Love this…I Know You said this isnt your’s but, Its touched me.
A friend posted this on facebook and I’m so glad she did. Absolutely loved it.
Thank you!
Thank you so much i just turned twenty and “the one who got away” was supposed to turn twenty in three days but died in his sleep two nights ago and all i can think of is my one who got away is gone forever and i can never do anything about it but your post made me realizes how fortunate i am to have ever had him in my life.
I am so sorry to hear about this.. My condolences.
I loved this. It’s so true that there are people that you ‘note’ for things in your life. My ‘one that got away’ is my best friend. He’s ‘noted’ for so many things in my life. He’s my first date, my first kiss, my first up-all-night-on-the-phone, my first boyfriend, my first love, my FIRST (; , my first heartbreak, and, now, the one who got away. I’m also his first everything.
I love what you said about going after them. I don’t want to wonder about what could’ve been. I want to know. I want to be able to tell our kids, “Hey, your daddy is mommy’s first love.” And, as you say at the end, it would be a great feeling to be able to say that they’re the one who ALMOST (but didn’t) get away. I’m going to do everything within my power to be able to say that!
It’s so strange that I found this exactly 4 years after it was posted. It’s reassuring to hear somebody blame it on the timing. For the last 3 years I’ve been blaming it on myself.
This is one of the best posts I have ever read. Going through this right now, I’ve been wondering about “the one that got away”. I never imagined that he would wander back into my life and now that I’m married, it makes me wonder why now? But after reading this, it makes me realize that it would never have worked and the beauty of the not knowing is that you can create a fantasy in your head about what might have been. And the reality is – it would not have worked because it wasn’t the right time. I feel peace now and can enjoy our new friendship instead of constantly thinking of what might have been because he got away.
I really appreciate your blog. I just happened to stumble upon this today and was so happy to read it. It definitely hit home for me. In my own personal experience, I was told I was ‘the one who got away’ almost 15 years ago. We were in our early 20′s then and I didn’t think I was anything more than just another girl, but found out later that I was wrong. Since then, the roles have been reversed and I have been struggling with being in love with this man for all those years. We live in different states, both of us still unmarried, but have been able to see each other from time to time. Now both in our mid 30′s we are realizing we both want to start settling down. I just can’t grasp the reality of having to let him go, “what could’ve been or ultimately “what still could be”. I want nothing more than for him to be happy but in all honesty I wish it could be with me.